Gees. I woke up feeling OK, and happy at least that i was alone, ie no responsibilities, and a bit worried about next weekend, which i had hoped to reserve for that special someone, yet family seemed to be bearing down.

This started me thinking about ego, and how one can feel controlled and dominated by another's use of their personality to assert own way. In fact we all do it.

I was a bit upset when i came back from getting the paper about this, and determined to find a way where i could assert my way, which was with a friend rather than family. It all seemed hopeless, and i wrote notes about it while i was at the computer, but when i came back from the shop and started cooking brekkie i decided to just let it roll over me; ie cry.

Suddenly i heard the door of the main house go - i wasn't alone - they had come this weekend instead of next. When i got over the shock i was quite civil, and had gone down the road to ask a friend if my eyes were red... he said they weren't and i looked good.

When i came in to the computer i realised that the book with the assertion theory was open and easily read - as they had asked to check their email. Oh well, stranger things have happened, and at least i mentioned to them that i might not be around next weekend (in other words no way in the world will i let them interfere with that).

Sigh. How ridiculous this all is. How willing and able i would defect, if i knew no-one would get hurt - and if i was welcome. :-)